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Choosing a Therapist
From the perspective of having been both a therapist and a client, I have found the following guidelines useful in choosing a therapist. I hope some or all of them are helpful to you.
1. Consider whether you have any preferences that may influence your decision.
For example, sometimes clients have a preference (or a non-negotiable need) for a particular therapy approach (eg. cognitive-behavioral), for their therapist to be a specific gender, or for the therapist to have (or not have!) a particular style.
If you've had therapy or counseling before, think back over those experiences and see if any positives and/or negatives about the experience jump out for you. Although the plusses and minuses might have been influenced by many factors, they may be signs of what works or doesn't work for you in a therapist.
On the other hand, many clients enter therapy without any specific preferences.
2. Be clear about what you want from therapy, and evaluate the therapist's competence in working with you on those goals.
Take some time to consider what you'd like to have happen in therapy. If you've not had therapy before, you may not be sure what's possible. That's fine; feel free to ask the therapist if a goal you have in mind is appropriate/achievable in therapy.
Is the therapist experienced in working with issues similar to yours? It's not necessary for the therapist to have personally experienced what you have experienced, but it may be useful to get some assurance that the issues you're bringing in are within the therapist's scope of competence. You may want to inquire about the therapist's education, training, and experience.
Sometimes you might just need a phone conversation with the therapist to get the assurance you need; sometimes an initial session might be required.
3. When you talk with the therapist, notice how you feel.
Feeling uncomfortable at times during therapy is not necessarily a bad sign, as therapy can delve into material that brings up discomfort for you. On the other hand, it's likely that you will know very well when you feel comfortable enough with a therapist. Is this a person who you can envision seeing regularly? Do you feel respected, engaged, and sufficiently at ease?
Since the relationship between you and the therapist is collaborative and thus critically important to the success of the therapy, it's important to assess whether this feels like a relationship that can work for you.
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